Sometimes it can be hard to be open about being a lesbian - for lots of reasons. But being able to paint an accurate picture of what's going on can increase the opportunity for the most appropriate and beneficial health care response. Some lesbians feel safer not talking about their sexuality or may fear inferior treatment if they do talk about sexuality - others feel it is very important to talk openly about this part of themselves and their life.

Coming out is a personal journey. Think about how coming out or not coming out will impact on the overall management of your health. How relevant is it in each situation? There is no right or wrong answer- it's about comfort and confidence. Talk to someone you trust about the pro's and con's of coming out in certain situations. If there are times when you're not comfortable seeing your usual health care provider (maybe they've been your family doctor for a long time, or they are well known within your community and you would feel less nervous with someone else), look around for alternatives. But see someone.

How open do you feel you can be about your partner/s, your family, and your support networks, your lifestyle? How relevant is it to the specific service you're after? Maybe it's not an issue. If you don't feel comfortable talking openly, try to think up responses to questions that are as close to your current situation as possible. As you build up a good rapport with your health care provider, you may feel comfortable speaking more openly.

Some lesbians find it useful to be direct with their health care worker about their sexuality, and take note of verbal and non-verbal responses. Some lesbians ask "Are you comfortable dealing with my health needs as a lesbian? If you're not, do you know someone you can refer me to?"

EXAMPLES OF QUESTIONS

Lots of lesbians can recall being asked questions that assume heterosexuality, so you may want to prepare some answers for common questions you may be asked. Here are a few suggestions.

Q: Do you have a boyfriend?
A: No, I have a girlfriend.
A: No, I see women.
A: I don't have a partner at the moment.
A: No.

Q: Do you use contraception/are you on the Pill?
A: No, I'm not sexually active with men.
A: No, it's not necessary.
A: Yes, to regulate my cycle.

Q: You're a lesbian! What do you do!?!!
A: What exactly do you need to know?
A: Are you asking me what I do with a partner sexually? Is that relevant at the moment?

Q: Why would you need a pap smear?
A: Because lesbians need pap smears too.
A: Because all women who have ever had sex need a pap smear.
A: Because it's an important part of looking after my health.
A: Because lesbians are just as likely to have precancerous cervical changes as heterosexual and bisexual women